Recently, I found myself crying on some silly thoughts. I feel like the world spins so fast and everybody started getting bigger and me still a dumb mess. Small things often trigger my depression, kainis kasi kung ano pa yung maliit diba? It makes me want to vanish. In my dreams, I always end up seeing myself in a blood bath. It gives me the creeps, but there's a feeling of ease and satisfaction. I believe that afterlife means me being born again. In another lifetime, in another physique. While I look forward to that day, I tried accepting the norms I used to hate. I tried to think of the possibilities of salvation, but it's not what I expected it to be. The people I look up to becomes the epitome of greed. They become mascots of my personal pandemonium. I got sad. Slowly I feel like I'm becoming one of them. Running doesn't make any sense at all when you have nothing to look forward to. Floating in the abyss makes me sick, but it's the only place to go. It's the only safe place I can be.